I wonder why I fight these demons,
when I know that they will win.
I will fall victim to myself -
my nature is to sin.
I’ve lost the path, lost my way.
And it’s a new struggle everyday.
Life should be happy, not like this.
I add one more pain to the long list.
Sometimes I’m certain it will end.
No pages to turn, no hearts to mend.
I’ll be in the shadows, and fade to black.
Give in to myself, never turning back.
The day is done and I feel like falling apart.
I’m so exhausted – mind, body, soul, and heart.
I sometimes wonder just how much I can give.
When you take away so much, trying to change the way I live.
Something stronger, and much better than my initial thoughts -
Lives inside me and today it fought.
Today’s battle is over, but the war’s not yet won.
Let’s start this all over with the rise of tomorrow’s sun.
Tell me who I’m suppose to be today, because I really just don’t know.
I’ll put on my happy face & this cold place will feel like home.
I’m the ragdoll of your life – just tell me what to do.
Fling me this way or that – I’ll be your dolly, shiny & new.
It’s an utter shame when facades become who we are.
And though we pretend, we cannot hide every scar.
I wear my inpenetrable shield
as a soldier wears his armor,
or that of a knight defending his life.
This shield, I will carry
til I am dust in the ground.
Merely a hushed memory
on some old friend’s clouded mind.
Happy and carefree,
my fool’s hands grip this thing,
swallowing every sour pain
to be forgotten by my hexed mind.
My closest companion
is forced to be my enemy
For darkened clouds inevitably clear
for the sun.
At day’s end, my shaking hands grasp my shield.
It is my only hope, my soul’s death
Though it is the scorn of my life,
it enables my next breath.
Recent Comments